Durable Human (2 book series)

Tag Archives: smartphones

Congress and Angry Parents Make Progress Fighting Social Media Harms. You Can, too.

Teen girl lying in bed looking at her phone

Social media platforms may soon need to acquiesce to the demands of Congress and upset parents. 

The prospect comes after the U.S. Senate Judiciary Committee called for testimony by Snap, X, TikTok, Discord, and Meta.

As their executives responded to angry questioning, parents stood silently behind them, holding up photographs of their children whose deaths are related to using the platforms.

“You have blood on your hands,” ranking member Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) accused Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg as the hearing began. “You have a product that’s killing people.”  

Continue reading

Travel with Baby: To Screen or Not to Screen?

Shannon at car door and Cooper in carseat get ready for a trip

Successful travel with a baby is possible without using a device for distraction. Child development experts explain why tech-free travel is a boost to a baby’s brain, psyche, and relationship with you.   

My daughter Shannon, her 5-month-old son, and I had just finished a successful 8-hour car trip south and back. It wasn’t always easy, but we cajoled Cooper with chatter, songs, books and toysnone of which had a cord or battery.

The best moment was on our ride back home.

It was pitch dark when Cooper began to howl. We’d been driving for hours and I thought we were out of ideas, but Shannon had one more. She began to “read” The Very Hungry Caterpillar—completely from memory. Softly and gently, like so many times before, she recited every page.

Coop soon quieted down and was asleep before the caterpillar became a butterfly.

A few days later, Shannon clicked on a YouTube video claiming to have the inside scoop on how to travel with a baby. As she recalls:  

“First, the mom-fluencer, who was sitting in the back seat, showed her husband up front behind the wheel. Then the mom panned a little bit further to reveal an iPad, already playing a video, secured by a plastic case fastened to the back seat about a foot in front of the baby’s face. I had to laugh. Ohhh. That’s the big secret?”

Why Parents Turn to Tablets

Although our trip was sans tech, Shannon considered the alternative. Continue reading

Parents Didn’t Need to Think Much About Attachment Until Now

Father lovingly feeds baby a bottle

Babies and their loving caregivers are naturally attracted to each other. Feeding a baby is a sacred time when lifelong bonds develop through tender caresses, late-night murmurs and loving, long glances.

But there’s competition now. A spare moment is an opportunity to catch up—with email, social media, and other digital demands on our attention.

Yet, a child’s vital need for Attachment remains. Without secure attachment, a baby can grow up to be someone who is anxious and less durable for the long run. Without the opportunity to closely study a caregiver’s mouth and expressions, a child’s language development can lag. Kids faced with phones instead of a parent can miss out on learning the vital skill (for survival in life and in business) of learning to read faces and understand emotions. 

Researching Attachment

Research is beginning to indicate that if the view of a caregiver’s face is blocked by a device or if a very young child is left to spend too much time in a 2-D screen environment, the trajectory of brain development can be altered, as seen in a newly-discovered syndrome among many toddlers. Continue reading

Insights Behind the TEDx Talk Durable Humans are Smarter Than Their Phones

Kids with arms around huge durable Sequoia tree.

Top TED talker Brene Brown nailed it at the Mom2Summit when she declared: “I’ve never done anything that was worth much unless I was scared shitless and nauseous.”

That’s exactly how I felt stepping onto the red circle at TEDx Tysons in Tysons, Virginia. But as I delivered “Durable Humans are Smarter Than Their Phones,” I was uplifted by the inspiration of a host of brilliant people I want to thank here.

Copious credit goes to Hilarie Cash, co-founder of ReStart, the nation’s first Internet addiction treatment center. Hilarie invited me in to meet people like “Jeff,” the young tech addict whose heartbreaking yet hopeful story you can read about here.

ReStart’s track record proves that simple things like cooking dinner and mopping the floor can help young people break the stranglehold of addiction and return to success in real life. By creating and sustaining Attachment, Hilarie told me in this interview, parents can help kids Continue reading

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